Anxiety Recovery

“What’s the magic solution? How can I wake up tomorrow feeling normal again? How long does anxiety recovery take?”

The truth is, recovery isn’t a quick fix, it’s about transforming a habit. Below, I outline the key principles of my coaching, designed to help you make the first steps on the road to recovery.

• Conscious Negative Thinking
• Habit Formation
• The Anxiety Cycle
• The Fundamentals of Anxiety Recovery STOP
• The One Hour Challenge

Conscious Negative Thinking

My recovery truly began when I started to understand and become aware of the power of conscious thinking and the subconscious mind. Before this, I had no clear awareness of the difference. I didn’t understand the contrast between going about my day subconsciously, or instead consciously thinking about a subject. The key to anxiety recovery is understanding this difference.

We control our conscious thoughts, we choose to question and analyse these thoughts just as we consciously choose to run, jump or sing. We naturally spend a large proportion of our time in the subconscious, driving a familiar route or brushing our teeth are examples of when our subconscious mind is in control and we’re not thinking about steering or brushing as it’s already taken care of. The opposite of this is true when we become stuck with a thought, one that perhaps we don’t like or makes us feel uneasy. It would have naturally come to us from our subconscious but we chose to question it through conscious negative thinking.

“What does that mean? Should I be thinking this way? What’s wrong with me?”.

There’s nothing wrong with us, it’s simply a thought. Thoughts naturally come and go, unless we choose to hold onto them and question them. The root cause of anxiety lies in this very moment: when we misunderstand how our choices affect our symptoms. For someone without an anxiety habit, the thought harmlessly passes by. They don’t enter conscious negative thinking and question it. They carry on with their day, allowing the next thought to come along. This is the natural flow, a cycle where thoughts come and go without getting stuck in the anxiety cycle.

“Stop trying to control every aspect of our lives up front, let things happen and they’ll sort themselves out.”

As soon as we understand that staying away from conscious negative thinking reduces our symptoms, we can make this become our new habit so longer term it becomes our natural response. The free guide and book go into detail about conscious negative thinking and how to eradicate it.

Once we understand that avoiding conscious negative thinking stops the anxiety cycle and symptoms, we can start turning this awareness into a new habit. Over time, this habit becomes second nature, and a part of who we are. In my book and coaching sessions, I dive deep into conscious negative thinking, what it is, why it happens, and most importantly, how to stop it for good.

Habit Formation

In the early days of my recovery, as my awareness of conscious negative thinking grew, I remember feeling continuously tested. I realised I was reacting to almost every event with conscious negative thinking. I soon understood that this was my problem, this is what my anxiety was, a habit. A habit of consciously questioning every thought, which triggered my body to release adrenaline, leading to overwhelming and distressing symptoms.

My researched focused on understanding habit formation and how to replace a bad habit with a new, healthier one. Understanding that changing a habit takes time and patience was a crucial part of my recovery. It’s natural to want immediate relief, but being patient during anxiety recovery can be challenging. Like learning a new skill or learning to playing an instrument, changing a habit comes with ups and downs.

I experienced setbacks and relapses, which is to be expected. Some days, it felt like nothing was coming together, whether from exhaustion, or just one of those days. But we’re human, not machines, so it’s important to go easy on ourselves during these times. On the flip side, there are also days of great progress, when our awareness of what we’re doing is clear and we feel confident in our new habit. The key is persistence, embracing both the challenges and the breakthroughs.

The key to anxiety recovery is to avoid setting rigid deadlines or putting too much pressure on yourself. Instead, take a step back and look at how far you’ve come over time. Recovery isn’t about waking up one day magically cured, just like you wouldn’t suddenly wake up able to play the piano. Progress happens gradually. As we improve our understanding and awareness through positive experiences and habit formation, these changes become part of who we are. One day, we’ll realise we can play that piano, or, in this case, we no longer have a habit of conscious negative thinking.

The Anxiety Cycle

Looking back since recovering, it’s easy to see how some of my actions were making my symptoms worse. When I was at the height of suffering, I couldn’t recognise it, but with education, banked positive experiences and a new habit, it’s obvious now. I was trapped in a never-ending cycle of anxiety.

Over time, my habit of conscious negative thinking became a compulsion. I would analyse every thought, and my body responded with adrenaline production, tricking my body into thinking there was a real threat. This surge of adrenaline worsened my symptoms: heart palpitations, sweating, and a loss of appetite. The cycle would begin again. I’d start questioning these symptoms, re-entering conscious negative thinking, and the cycle would repeat itself, each time reinforcing the anxiety habit.

“I can feel my heart beating out of my chest, when will this stop? What’s wrong with me?”

As many can relate, once the anxiety cycle takes hold, it can feel impossible to find a way out. The key to recovery is replacing the habit of conscious negative thinking with a new habit, one where we don’t actively engage or disrupt the natural flow of thoughts. When this new habit becomes second nature, the cycle starts to break down. Less adrenaline is released, symptoms begin to fade, and the urge to fall back into conscious negative thinking weakens. Over time, this becomes part of you and your subconscious and this is where long term anxiety recovery exists.

At the exact moment when we become aware of an anxious thought and feel symptoms, this is when we have a choice in which direction to take. We either resist the temptation of conscious negative thinking, or we enter the anxiety cycle.

Fundamentals of Anxiety Recovery – STOP

After reading my book, many people ask.

“I’ve read your book, what do I do next? Am I doing this right?”

It’s also common to reach a point where you think,

“What can I do now to recover?”

I used to feel the same way, caught in the mindset of control, always searching for the next step. But the truth is we’re already doing too much by constantly engaging in conscious negative thinking for every symptom, feeling, or thought that comes our way. This is our anxiety habit. To recover, we need to do less. The education and understanding you gain from reading is there to support your awareness, not to add more to-do’s. The key is to not enter conscious negative thinking.

I developed some fundamentals of recovery as a reminder of this. Simplicity, Time, Overthinking, and Power, the four elements of recovery that form the acronym STOP. The STOP method serves as a reminder that when you feel confused or overwhelmed about what to do next, the answer is simple: stop. Not do. Stop engaging in conscious negative thinking, stop trying to control, and instead allow the process of recovery to unfold. Each letter of STOP represents a crucial element of recovery.

Simplicity is essential in recovery, especially since our habit is doing too much, constantly questioning, fixing, and scrambling through our thoughts. While the path to recovery is simple in theory, focusing on not doing, it can be challenging. Our ingrained habit is to engage in conscious negative thinking, making it difficult to embrace this new approach.

Time is a crucial factor in changing a habit; it doesn’t happen overnight. Without recognising that recovery is a gradual process, we can easily become impatient and frustrated. This often leads us to jump from one recovery method to another, prolonging our habit of questioning and engaging in conscious negative thinking. Allowing time for change is essential for lasting recovery.

Overthinking highlights that conscious negative thinking is at the heart of our anxiety. When we become aware of this behaviour, it can be the first crucial step on the road to recovery. Recognising what we’re doing allows us to make conscious choices and start breaking the anxiety cycle.

Power is a fundamental aspect of recovery; it reinforces the idea that we have the strength to heal and that recovery is achievable and within our reach. However, maintaining this inner power and belief over time can be challenging. Throughout the recovery journey, we begin to experience glimpses of what full recovery feels like. Every success we achieve, like attending a social event we dreaded, builds our confidence and reinforces our sense of power. Each step forward reminds us that we can shape a future free from anxiety, as long as we hold onto that belief.

The One Hour Challenge

As my recovery took steps in the right direction, I began to recognise my habit of questioning through conscious negative thinking and endless research. I decided to give myself a day off from it all. I started noting when my symptoms were most severe and found that they coincided with the times I spent online or absorbed in books, trying to find answers. Each new method I encountered only added to my confusion, triggering the anxiety cycle of conscious negative thinking, adrenaline production, and physical symptoms. To combat this, I set myself a challenge. The next day, I would refrain from research or questioning in an effort to reduce my conscious negative thinking habit.

This challenge proved to be quite difficult and I didn’t succeed. I decided I needed to simplify it to just one hour. During that hour, I committed to avoiding new information, repeating key phrases in my mind, trying to eliminate my feelings, or asking myself questions like “What if?” or “When will I?” To resist the urge to read anything, whether online, on my phone, or in books, I decided to go for a walk. This change in environment helped eliminate the physical compulsion to question. However, avoiding mental questioning was more challenging, especially in the early days when my habit was at its peak.

“Is this right? Am I doing this now? Do I feel any different?”

This is still conscious negative thinking. The aim is to reduce this as much as possible. I persisted with these one-hour challenges and began to understand that I didn’t need to force myself to explore every thought. In fact, it took less energy and was easier to refrain from falling into the habitual cycle of conscious negative thinking. Over time, these one-hour challenges evolved into an hour of practicing mindfulness, living in the moment, and operating on autopilot. Thoughts flowed in and out, whether positive or negative, and I learned to resist the strong urge to analyse or question them. For that hour, it didn’t matter what I thought; I allowed the natural process of the mind to occur, preventing thoughts from getting stuck.

As I progressed in my recovery, the one-hour challenge gradually extended, eventually becoming my new habit. This shift transformed my perspective on life, making it more fulfilling and less draining because I was doing less. There were ups and downs along the way and it wasn’t a perfect journey, but I remained committed until this new way of thinking became a part of me and my new habit.

Many clients find this approach manageable because it feels less daunting to start small and gradually extend their practice as their understanding, awareness, and positive experiences grow.